Moving on up

To all my lovely readers,

I've migrated this blog over to www.pourgatherfold.blogspot.com.

Come and find new content and way to interact over there!

xo,

Jenny

Twenty Seven

Yesterday marked my twenty seventh year on this planet. Twenty. Seven. That seems serious, big, grown-up. A number that takes some reflection and some deep gratitude.

Yesterday, I woke up next to my boyfriend of almost four years, and like I do every morning, I soaked in his sleeping face and felt at home, a deep sense of trust and unparalleled vulnerability. It amazes me that after all of these days and nights,  he still finds new ways to gaze into my eyes and make me feel as if I am the only person in the world that has ever mattered this much.

This year marked the first since moving to Los Angeles that I had a tribe to celebrate beside. A group of beautiful human beings that inspire, motivate, champion, root for, challenge, ground, and uplift me; each and every day. As the night wound down and the glasses filled with dark red wine, we fell into a easy laughter; a small group that was open and willing to get to know the neighbor next to them with ease and openness. I am so grateful for this family. This home away from home. Without them I would be lost here, in this confusing and often heart breaking city. But with these people in my life, I find that I am able to stand a bit straighter, feel a bit softer, and love a bit bigger that I thought imaginable.

This is for you. Those of you that let me know that I have a place in your life  and that it is meaningful and deep. To all of you, you warm my heart and make it easier and easier to build a life in this strange and beautiful city. To you I am so very grateful.

Getting REAL by being vulnerable

"What we focus on EXPANDS." -Danielle LaPorte 

Think about that. Re-read that sentence. Now read it out loud. Those four little words can change your life.

Tonight, I chose to dive deep. I opened an emotional canyon earlier today and I didn't realize how much I was carrying in my body; my fears, my worries, my anxieties, my uncertainty. I feel heavy and caged just typing those words. I realized that my body has been trying to tell me, for days, that my mind was weighted down, burdened to the brim. My body was yelling at the top of it's lungs for me to step back, get quiet, and listen to the steady voice that I often try desperately to ignore. But tonight, I opened a book I've been wanting to start for months, The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte and I realized that I needed to get grounded, rooted, seated, quiet, introspective, to go deep, to get real.

I always find that when I make time to shift, I am able to connect sincerely, truly, honestly, and radically. I move from hiding, covering up, being fearful, escaping, to BEING TRULY INTENTIONAL with how I want to show up in the world.

Take some time to get RADICALLY REAL. To focus on what fills you up and EXPAND from that place. Magic happens there.

My Roots

"Look up. Zoom out from the daily tasks and see the holy weaving of your time and love and action." -Danielle LaPorte 

My mom: She takes on the world; FULLY with lots and lots of questions, no fears (outwardly), no limits, no rules, no apologies. She knows her worth and will fight honorably to defend her strengths and passions. I aspire to be a small fraction of who my mother is every day. 

My granny: Never have I met someone with such soft edges, such grace, such groundedness in her choices, such strength. She constantly amazes me with her depths of compassion, insight, and wisdom. I have and continue to learn so much from listening to her stories, her views and to be a witness to her magic as my grandmother. 

My sister: For her courageous and unbounded life. Kelly moves through the world from a place of joy and wonderment. She takes on every day and finds every ounce of magic in its edges and then fully engages from that place. She is stronger than anyone I know and has such a capacity for warmth, wisdom and kindness. I am so grateful for her wild side, for her magic. 

Take a moment, think about your lineage, the place you started from, the people that gave you roots; Honor them by being YOU. 

                    

These small things

"Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in ones own sunshine" 

Ralph Waldo Emerson 

These things light me up: bright, blazing, warm, comfortable, home. 

I am constantly humbled by the life I've been given, the careful crafting that goes into all the small and finite moments that we share and build with others. I looked at this view and thought; this is where joy is found, where peace is found, where breath is found. 

These small things make up every moment of who we are, we just need remembering. 

I hope that you find a moment today to pause, surrender, and truly FEEL. Remember why you love, laugh, dance, sing, create, build, design, surrender. 

Unease and New Beginnings

Recently, my boyfriend and I moved into a new place to call home. It has that first date feeling: I was super enthusiastic about looking for that space that I had been craving for the past few years, open to change, open to new experiences, open to the possibly of a new place to rest of head, but so far it feels awkward, strange, and really vunerable. It's such a strange way to feel after we had been thinking and dreaming of building a new space together. Trust me, I love my partner in crime, I have been waiting a long time for him to agree that our own space was also right for him. And although the space came easily, we literally found a place and were moved in the next week, I feel like a part of me is lost here. Something shifted in my body and in my mind and I haven't been able to settle into my comfort zone. It's been full of challenges, of lessons, of learning, and last night I realized how lucky I am to be so "in it" with someone. I am not alone, walking in the dark, with my eyes closed. I get to wake up, kiss that man beside me, and feel grateful. EVERYDAY. I've shared countless firsts with this man of mine, life has been teaching us the meaning of change and challenge, but we are always in cahoots, really in in together. So bring on the discomfort, find a way to let your light shine, and know that life is just asking you to show up fully to who you are, nothing more and nothing less. It's harder than it sounds, but I love the way that feels. 

Heart Bursting: Kicking Cancer's Asana

Meet Mary Beth LaRue and Jacki Carr of

It was a battle. The alarm just went off and my body knew that the time it needed to reset was cut short. I opened my eyes, slowly climbed out of bed, and slipped on my favorite pair of yoga pants. My body protested until it figured out that we were driving to the ocean and then the spirits began to lift. As soon as I parked my car and found my way down Main St., stopping in for a chai at the hole-in-the-wall Groundworks, and devouring a dreamy slice of banana nut bread, I felt lighter, freer, and sure that the time I missed under my covers would soon be forgotten.

Some mornings we just need to get up early, fight against out tired eyes, and do some yoga with some inspiring souls. And trust me, these ladies, are INSPIRING to the core. Mary Beth and Jacki are the women of Rock Your Bliss, a movement to put goals into your mind and connect them in your body.

"the moment you set a goal it's already in action in your body and in the universe" (Mary Beth)

This particular gorgeous morning, the sun was shining, the air felt crisp, and I could feel the universe buzzing.

The Rock Your Bliss event was held at the incredible yogitoes rExperience Lab. The space, with it's beautiful hardwood floors and open skylight which poured warm yellow light into the room, instantly felt like home. The event was sponsoring Kick Cancer's Asana, a non-profit that raises awareness for Renal Cell Carcinoma. We were all jazzed to be there for an amazing cause and even more excited about lifting the energy of the room to help send those we love healing yogi vibes. The event started with Jacki "dropping some knowledge" and seriously I LOVE WHEN JACKI DROPS SOME KNOWLEDGE! She talked a lot about living our lives ON PURPOSE (not the same thing as WITH PURPOSE). This subtle semantic choice made me stop in my tracks. Yes, living life on purpose, puts me in the now, it holds me accountable to myself and those around me. It means that every action, choice, and decision that I participate in shapes who I am in this moment. That is profound, and we hadn't even gotten to the yoga yet.

Mary Beth was up next. She calmly set the space and got us mentally prepared to absorb Jacki's intention and bring it into our bodies through our practice on the mat. Her flow was playful, challenging, and fun. The most profound moment of the practice was when she said, "My teacher always says that balance is found being resting and playing", and so is the practice. It's about knowing when to take a leap, jump into the unknown, set sail, and then also aligning with the fact that we need to slow down and find a time to rest our bones every now and then. When we live in this place of balance, we are free. Most practices I struggle to find my breath. It's always there, I just don't always connect to it. As I slowed down my movements and focused on practicing "on purpose", MB said, "create a space and fill it with your breath". I let my body talk to me in a way I hadn't been able to access before. I made space for what I needed in my day, in my body, in the moment, and I sent breath there! Rock Your Bliss's mantra "making shift happen" perfectly sums up the mind and body connection that these two women create.

And these two are up to some seriously cool stuff! Follow them and stay tuned in for more amazing experiences to radically alter the way you show up for life.

I know it's blurry. We're yogis, blurry is fine. 

Rad Raffles from Tiny Time Machines and Lalita Designs. They haven't left my wrist for weeks. 

rExperience Lab